


Only

by spicybellarke



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Bellarke, Clarke makes it to space, Drama, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Illness, Smut, The Ark, canon compliant till 4x13, space, spacekru
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-28
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-05-15 00:13:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14779961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spicybellarke/pseuds/spicybellarke
Summary: “You with me?” Bellamy asked with an emotion in his eyes that Clarke couldn't place.“Always.” Clarke responded, placing her free hand on Bellamy’s. Her eyes peered into his, full of promise.Clarke manages to make it to space with Spacekru, but she doesn't quite understand how to deal with the unforeseen consequences.





	1. Chapter 1

The vibrating hum of the Ark filled Clarke’s ears as she watched the Earth burn. Once a place of dreams, now only a burning shell of it’s promises. Clarke took a deep breath, the artificial oxygen filling her lungs.

The orange Earth glared menacingly with its promise of death and destruction. Rapt steps alerted Clarke to a presence in the room.

“I was wondering where you went.” Bellamy’s voice broke the silence from behind her.

Clarke kept looking out of the window, turning her body the opposite way of Bellamy. 

“Well I mean there isn't many places I could go.” Clarke replied shakily, keeping her face towards the window.

Bellamy’s eyebrows furrowed at Clarke’s position faced away from him. Her avoidance of eye contact made him feel unsettled. “Clarke..” He murmured stepping forward enough to place a warm hand on her shoulder. 

As much as Clarke wanted to recoil, she found her body melting into the comforting touch. 

Bellamy squeezed her shoulder slightly. Clarke still refused to at him. With a last squeeze, Bellamy slowly pulled Clarke’s body towards him. 

Clarke willingly turned in time with the hand on her shoulder. She glanced up at him for a moment before her eyes dropping to his feet.

Her eyes held a sadness that destroyed Bellamy’s heart. She was the strongest person he knew, but at this moment he knew she needed him. He pulled her into a hug, her smaller frame pressed tight against him. Bellamy held on tight, he was afraid if he loosened his grip he’d lose her. He could feel her shaky breathing against his chest and he relished in the thought that she still was. He thought he was going to lose her today.

Clarke.

His Clarke.

“I was so worried.” Bellamy whispered, placing a kissing on the top of her blonde head. “I thought I was going to have to leave without you and I don't know if I would…” Bellamy trailed off banishing the thought entirely, he wasn't ready to face the reality of what could of happened. He could of had to leave Clarke behind, his head. Bellamy flattened a hand against her back, pushing her closer to him. 

“Bellamy,” Clarke quietly cried against his chest. “How am I supposed to live up here safe and sounds when I don’t deserve it?” Clarke nestled further into his chest, trying to keep Bellamy from seeing her tears.

Bellamy’s mouth felt dry at her confession. He could feel the wetness begin to soak through the thin material of his t-shirt, but he didn't mind.

He pulled her away from him giving him enough space to grab her face and pull it up to meet his eyes. His hands dwarfed her cheeks and her blue eyes were bloodshot from the tears falling from her face onto his palms.

“Don't hide from me.” Bellamy breathed barely above a whisper. “Ever.”

Clarke sniffed, fresh tears falling.

“Clarke, we have all done things. I’ve killed more people than you have, isolated the people I've cared about, do you think I deserve to be here?” Bellamy’s eye implored Clarke’s. 

Bellamy himself knew he wasn't worthy, but Clarke deserved to live. All he wanted her to do was live and be happy. He would do whatever he had to do to make that happen.

Clarke’s eyes widened at Bellamy’s question.

“What? Bellamy? Of course, you deserve to be here. That's not what I meant.” Clarke stuttered over her words. “Bellamy…” Clarke scrambled over her words. 

She was interrupted by Bellamy delicately placing a kiss on her forehead in a soothing manner. His warm lips left her forehead and Bellamy leaned forward to meet her forehead. This was the closest they had ever been. Forehead to forehead. This was an extremely intimate gesture, but Clarke couldn't help but want to get closer to him. He was the only one who had ever made her feel this safe.

Looking into his eyes, Clarke felt something brewing in her stomach. His warm breath tickled her nose, the warmth alone soothed her to the bone. There was peace in her mind for the first time.

“Bellamy?” Raven’s voice carried from the hallway to left. Bellamy reluctantly pulled his face away, lifting his head up. “Did you find her?” Raven’s airy voice called from behind a wall.

“Raven, I found her in the bay window room.” His voice gruff and deeper than usual. His eyes never left Clarke's. Brown to blue, an understanding running through them.

Raven’s black hair flashed into the room, her hurt leg lagging behind her. “Well we couldn't exactly lose her, but I need to talk to you about the coms, Bellamy.” Raven paused for a minute considering what to say. I can't make contact with the bunker and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to.”

Bellamy’s whole body shifted from Clarke to Raven. “What do you mean? What’s wrong with the coms?”

Raven shifted her weight and began walking to the window. “Nothing is wrong with machinery of the coms, the issue is that.” Raven says while placing her finger on the glass of the window, pointing to the scorching earth.

“The radiation?” Clarke questioned, stepping into the area next to Raven in the window.

“Yea, it's blocking radio signals and I don't know when the radiation will let up enough for the signals to be able to pass through.” Raven’s eyes sadly watched the earth.

“So you mean to tell me that we might not be able to contact the bunker?” Bellamy questioned, his voice quiet.

Clarke turned towards Bellamy, who was staring at Raven.

“That's exactly what I am saying.” Raven bluntly stated. She turned towards Clarke with a face Clarke could not quite decipher.

“Bellamy, just don't worry too much about it now. We’ve got bigger problems to worry about right now. Monty is having trouble getting the algae farm to produce, I don't know how we are going to get down, there is just so much…” 

“Raven, it's okay.” Clarke’s voice cut through Raven’s inner turmoil. Clarke looked between both Bellamy and Raven, “Both of you, it's okay. We have time.” 

That was a first. They had time. No war, they could enjoy life.

A small smile bloomed on Clarke’s face.

Bellamy and Raven’s eyes looked at her, studying her expression. A calm mask was placed on Clarke. She had to be strong. If one of them fell apart, all of them did. If she was strong, they were all strong.

Bellamy ran a hand through his unruly space helmet hair. The wariness of the day sinking into his bones.

“Why don't you go get some sleep?” Raven suggested. “There isn't anything we can do about it now.”

“Who am I bunking with?” Bellamy asked, his hand still rubbing at the skin at the back of his neck.

“You and Clarke are sharing a room.” Raven answered as if the answer was self-explanatory.

“We are?” Clarke asked questioning, but not opposing it. 

Raven stared at the two of them for a moment with a disbelieving expression on her face.

“There are four rooms and eight of us. Monty and Harper, Emori and Murphy, Echo and I, then you and Bellamy.” Raven smiled small. “I didn’t think Echo with either of you would mixed well.”

Bellamy simply nodded his head.

Echo was a sore spot for Bellamy. He may of stopped her from committing suicide, but forgiveness would take a bit longer.

“I’ve got to go help Emori with the coms, she’s getting antsy.” Raven shrugged her shoulders, with her hands in her pockets.

Clarke met Raven’s gaze with a small smile. Raven nodded with a slight smile before her gaze returned back to Bellamy.

Raven’s hand brushed Bellamy’s shoulder in a calming gesture. “She’ll be okay.” Raven walked out the room down the hallway to the common room.

Silence filled the room that they stood in. Clarke glanced at Bellamy who was facing the window with rapt attention. With a deep sigh, she began to walk out of the room. Bellamy’s calloused hand grasped her wrist lightly.

“You with me?” Bellamy asked with an emotion in his eyes that Clarke couldn't place.

“Always.” Clarke responded, placing her free hand on Bellamy’s. Her eyes peered into his, full of promise.

Something in Bellamy’s eyes flashed, but with a deep breath and a light squeeze he trailed his hand back to his side. Bellamy turned towards the window, his sad gaze following. 

He was worried for Octavia and she knew it was crippling him. The unknown, but he needed this moment to make peace that he wouldn't hear from his sister for the next five years.

Clarke left the small room in favor for the common room. Raven sat at the com center a pair of headphones strapped to her head with Emori watching closely to what she was doing. With a final glance at the two girls, Clarke began to walk by the bedrooms, in search of her own.

She could hear Murphy and Monty arguing about something mundane in the algae farm. “Why don't you just shut the hell up, Murphy?” Clarke heard Harper’s high voice chime in.

She bit her lip, hearing the conversation. She continued down the hall in search of Bellamy and her room.

Passing by the door across the hall to the left of her own, she could hear the small sniffling of someone. Clarke stopped in front of the door and through the small crack of the door she could see Echo on the bed trying to control her emotions.

Tears leaked down the tall brunette's face. A pit in Clarke’s stomach formed, seeing the strong warrior breaking down.

Clarke stood there for a moment trying to decide what to do. Echo was alone, the last of her people. She couldn't imagine the pain of everything Echo had been through, but now wasn't the time. Echo had betrayed Bellamy, and by that logic betrayed Clarke too. Clarke wished she could of been the bigger person to give her comfort, but she wasn't ready. 

Clarke could feel the fatigue of the last year seeping into her being.

Clarke continued her walk to her bedroom, opening the door to reveal a moderate sized room with a single queen bed. 

A bed. She hadn't had one since Becca’s mansion and she now had one for the next five years.

Clarke brushed her hand against the grey comforter, the ribs of the sewing feeling nice on her hand. She would have somewhere to sleep, that didn't involve the dirt. This was too much all at once.

A shower. She needed a shower, Clarke decided. Clarke began walking to the small bathroom attached to the side of her room. She pushed the pocket door into the wall, she flipped on the lights.

Walking into the blessed room, it turned out this wasn't a small bathroom. This was the largest bathroom she had ever saw, she'd have to let Raven use it sometime. It would make it easier with her leg.

Clarke turned slightly to the left, her reflection startling her. She looked tired and her hair was everywhere. It was severely damaged from what the exposure to the elements of Earth had done to it. Her skin was pink and eyes puffy and red. Clarke looked like a mess. Her hair was matted from her braid that had fallen out with dirt that would take ages to get untangled.

She began digging in the drawers of the cabinets in search of something. The cool metal of what she was looking for met her hand.

“What are you doing?” Bellamy’s thick voice questioned from the door.

The sudden voice startled Clarke causing her to jump a little.

“Can you help me?” Clarke looked up, grasping the pair of scissors.

“With what exactly?” Bellamy’s eyebrows furrowed.

“I want to start new.” Clarke breathed. Can you help me cut my hair?”

“You think this will make you feel better?” Bellamy asked, stepping into the bright room of the bathroom.

“I hope so.” Clarke’s eyes burned bright into Bellamy’s with a hope he had only seen once or twice before.

Bellamy nodded, offering a small smile.

Clarke handed him the scissors. “Try to make it as even as you can.”

Bellamy shook his head playfully.

“How much do you want cut?” Bellamy asked, testing the pair of scissors by opening and closing them in rapid succession.

“To here.” Clarke motioned to the area above her shoulder.

“You got it, Princess.” 

The use of that nickname brought a small smile on her face.

Bellamy positioned the scissors to the area that Clarke wanted cut off and with a shaky hand he closed the scissors. The blonde hair fell and littered the floor.

Clarke couldn't help the small giggle that left her lips. This was their chance. She could start new. They could start new. Together.

Bellamy playfully rolled his eyes at her reaction. In quick succession, he finished the rest of her hair.

The person in the mirror staring back at her was Clarke, but at the same time someone she was just getting to meet. This was a new beginning.

“Thank you, Bellamy.” Clarke’s eyes left her own meeting his in the mirror and Bellamy nodded. He ruffled the hair at the back of her neck before taking his leave. She stopped him grabbing his hand. “For everything. You’re the reason I’m alive.” Bellamy bit his lip and nodded his head in acknowledgement before shutting the door behind him.

The haircut made her feel lighter, but she knew it wasn't the cure. It sure did help though.

Clarke began the water of the shower. She removed her shirt carefully. Radiation burns littered her body, it was worse in some areas than others. She just had to be careful and let them heal, there was no need to fuss over them. The black blood of the injuries was dried and already scabbed over. They hurt like a bitch though.

The shower was lukewarm, but that was the best she could do with the burns. Stepping in the shower, Clarke hissed at the contact of the water on her injuries. The sting slowly subsided after a few more moments. She began to rinse the dirt and just the grime of the earth off of her. She watched the water go from a grayish-brown to clear.

She made sure to clean the areas around her burns, she couldn't let them get infected. Her newly cut hair was washed with an apple scented shampoo and she was good as new.

Soap was something hard to come across on earth, but using it again felt bittersweet.

Drying off with the gray towel on the towel rack, she quickly got dressed in the clothes Harper had placed in a container on the floor in the bathroom. She would have to organize it between what was Bellamy’s and her and put them away, but that was a tomorrow chore.

Clarke picked out a simply white shirt with grey shorts. All Ark issued and they were a little big.

Beggars couldn't be choosers.

Clarke unlatched the bathroom door and walked in the bedroom area where Bellamy had the lamp by the bed switched on.

The water dripped from her newly cut hair down her back, creating an uncomfortable wet spot at the nape of her neck.

“You finished with the shower?” Bellamy asked from the bed, deeply engrossed in a book. Clarke couldn't make out the title from where she was, but she assumed it was history related.

“Yea, it's all yours.” Clarke smiled, brushing past him as she made her way to the bed.

Clarke looked at the left side of the bed where Bellamy’s book and journal littered the bed.

“I already may have chosen a side.” Bellamy said as he rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

“It's all yours, I promise I won't take it.” Clarke winked at Bellamy playfully. Before climbing on the right side of the bed and getting situated under the covers.

Bellamy nodded with a slight smile before closing the bathroom door, latching it.

Clarke laid there in the bed. Despite the comfort that the bed offered, sleep evaded her. Her mind was running by too fast. Nothing could silence the feeling of guilt and sadness of everything she had done, the people she had condemned to death. 

She tossed and turned, but sleep refused to come. Her breathing was harsh and she was frustrated. She laid there for what seemed like eternity.

With a click, the bathroom door unlatched. Bellamy walked out with his hair wet and lacking a shirt.

Clarke’s eyes widened at the sight. Bellamy quickly noticed Clarke’s reaction.

“Sorry, it’s a habit.” Bellamy said, while reaching for a shirt.

“It's okay. Do whatever makes you comfortable.” Clarke’s voice was low and tired.

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

Bellamy placed the shirt back down and climbed into the bed next to Clarke. Laying next to her, he turned and facing her.

“I was certain you’d be a sleep by now.”

Clarke’s eyes watered slightly, but she took a deep breath calming herself.

“Hey, now.” Bellamy comforted her, pulling her close to him.

“It's just…” Clarke started, but her breath hitched in her throat.

“I know. I get it too. Just breathe. I’ll be here with you the whole time.”

Clarke nestled her face in his throat, inhaling the musky scent of the soap he must of used.

Bellamy wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer to his body. Her muscles relaxed as he began to draw random patterns down her spine.

“I don't know what I’d do without you.” Bellamy murmured into her hair. 

That was the last thing Clarke heard before sleep overcame her. For the first time in her whole life, she felt safe. She finally had a future.


	2. Chapter 2

Clarke woke with a start. The bed was too warm, sweltering even. Clarke tried to kick off the covers off of her her body, but the blankets were wrapped around her legs. She felt extremely weak and tired, her legs tingles and her stomach felt uneasy.

Clarke reached out her hand in search of Bellamy only to find cooler sheets that alerted her of his absence. A twinge of pain in her abdomen stopped her movement all together.

Clarke laid her face on the coolness of Bellamy’s side of the bed, she didn't want to move. She felt unwell, but she had things she had to do.

Laying there for a few more moments, she began to untangle herself from the sheets. After a slight struggle she managed to free herself of the sheet that was wrapped around her ankle. She let her body slide off the bed, her feet hitting the cold tile of the floor.

She tumbled into the bathroom shakily. She flipped on the light on and weakly walked the sink. The light hurt her eyes, she felt like she had contracted the worse kind of flu you could get. Clarke threw water on her face, wiping the water off her face with hand towel. She looked up into the mirror to her pallor complexion. Her blue eyes were dull, hair wild and curly from sleeping with it wet. She looked like a hot mess.

She took a deep breath, but it hurt. Her whole body hurt. She felt like she was being punished for breathing, that's how bad it hurt. Clarke gently lifted her shirt above her head to see exactly what she was expecting to see. Her burns were surrounded by deep black bruises. She had radiation poisoning. The nightblood hadn't worked and the radiation exposure was killing her now. She should of never taken off that damned helmet.

Deep black bruises surrounded the areas around her burns as well up her arms. She looked as if she had spots, they covered her entire body.

Clarke took a deep breathing, clearing her thoughts. She could fix this, she just would have to find where the medication was. Her mother had taught her about Potassium Iodine. It would help. It would stop her from taking in anymore radiation.

A sudden knock on the door brought Clarke from her thoughts.

“Clarke? You in there?” Harper’s light voice called from behind the bathroom door.

“I’m in the bathroom, Harper.” Her voice was terse and sharp.

“Okay! Bellamy sent me in here to tell you that breakfast was ready.” Harper added quickly.

“He was too busy to come himself?” Clarke’s voice rasped.

“I mean he’s been up for most of the morning helping Monty get the farm producing.” Harper answered back, slightly confused about Clarke’s attitude.

“Okay, I’ll be there in a minute.” Clarke paused for a moment contemplating what to say next. “Don't wait up!” She added, Clarke didn't need expectations.

Clarke waited to hear Harper’s footfall leave the room. Clarke turned back towards the mirror, she ran a worried hand through her hair. Tears were burning her eyes from tears wanting to descend, but Clarke refused to let herself cry. Now was not the time to cry.

Clarke bent down to grab a shirt out of the bin on the floor. Suddenly, her vision turned black and she had to hold on to the wall for dear life so she wouldn't hit the ground.

Tears threatened again.

Slowly, but surely her vision began to return. Clarke took deep and heavy breaths, but fuck this felt worse than anything she had ever felt in her life.

Placing a long sleeve shirt on her body and replacing her shorts for leggings, she slowly stood up grabbing the counter as a guide to get out the bathroom. 

Clarke slowly walked out of the bathroom into the common room. She expected to see Bellamy or Raven at the very least, but the only one sitting and eating was Echo.

“Where is everyone?” Clarke asked her voice scratchy.

“They are working on the coms. Bellamy wanted to see for himself why they aren't working. Harper and Emori are looking around.” Echo said as she turned to face Clarke, her sharp face turning soft at the appearance of Clarke disheveledness. “Clarke, are you sick?” Echo’s voice asked lowering to barely a whisper.

“No, I’m not.” Clarke quickly snapped.

Too quickly.

Echo eyed her for a minute before passing a bowl of algae to Clarke. Echo’s eyes never leaving Clarke.

Clarke took the bowl in her hand, staring at the green mush. A wave of nausea hit Clarke and she quickly pushed the bowl away.

“It’s from the radiation, isn't it?” 

Clarke's eyes didn't leave the bowl.

“Echo, I need your help. I need to find the potassium iodine, it will counteract most of the radiation. I just don't…” Clarke was cut of by another wave of nausea.

“I’m going to get Bellamy.” Echo stood up quickly.

“Wait Echo, no.” Clarke caught her hand weakly. “We don't need to worry them with this, the medicine will fix it.” Clarke met Echo’s eyes pleadingly. “I promise, I’ll be better after the medicine.”

Echo glanced between Clarke and the com room for a moment.

“I’ll get you the medicine, but if you don't get better. I’ll drag Bellamy’s ass in this room myself.” 

“The medicine will help. I promise.” Clarke lied through her teeth, but she couldn't worry Bellamy anymore than he already was. She didn't know for certain if it would.

“Okay, but you have to give me a little time to go find it.” 

“I will, but be as quick as you can.” Clarke pleaded.

Echo nodded her head in acknowledgement. Clarke could hear her footsteps lead into the storage room. Clarke sighed as she crossed her arms and placed them on the table, laying her head on the pillow they created.

“Clarke?” Bellamy’s deep voice jolted Clarke awake.

“Hmm? What?” Clark’s head shot up. She quickly regretted the decision as she had a head rush.

“Why are you sleeping on the table?” Bellamy asked, picking up Clarke’s chin inspecting her face.

“I’m just tired and I have a headache.” Clarke replied, omitting the truth a bit.

“Why didn't you just stay in bed if you didn't feel well?”

“It’s nothing, just the aftermath of everything that's happened. The stress and just getting used to being in space again that's all.” Clarke didn't meet Bellamy’s gaze, staring straight ahead shrugging her shoulders.

Bellamy’s watched her with inquisitive eyes. 

Clarke slowly glanced up at Bellamy. Her eyes were red and tired.

Bellamy softened immediately. “You should probably lay down. You won’t get any better working yourself to death.” 

Clarke shook her head no. She was hurting too much to move. She also didn't want credit for working when she had really been a useless potato since come up here.

“Come on.” Bellamy began to gently pull her up, but her body resisted. “Clarke, you’re really starting to worry me.”

“It’s just my headache making me dizzy.” Clarke said, rubbing her temples. “I’m not dying.”

Bellamy’s face was filled with worry now.

Great. Just what she wanted.

“I’ll help you get to bed.” Bellamy offered, his eyes wide.

Clarke stared at him for a moment before nodding yes.

Bellamy offered her his hand and she took it. Bellamy did most of the work, pulling her body to a vertical position. Before Clarke could even register what was happen, she was suddenly horizontal. Bellamy’s arms rested underneath her knees and her head laid cradled on his chest. Clarke inwardly winced as her bruised side was pushed against Bellamy’s hard chest.

With long strides, Bellamy brought her to the room. The bed remained unmade and the blankets were tangled from Clarke’s blanket struggle this morning.

Bellamy laid her gently down on the bed, her head resting on the pillow of his side. It smelled very vaguely of him, which soothed Clarke.

He pulled the covers up to her chin. Softly he brushed his knuckles down the side of her face.

“You feel a little warm, are you sure you are okay?” Bellamy noted, his hand lingering on her face.

“I’m a doctor, remember?” The sides of Clarke’s lips slightly raised at her comment.

“Okay, but I swear to god…” Bellamy’s voice trailed off. He looked at Clarke for a moment before sighing. “Get some rest, please.” His voice weak and tired.

Clarke nodded, snuggling into the comforter to appease him. 

He sighed, tucking a loose piece of blonde hair behind her ear. Using his knuckles, he pushed himself off the bed. He closed the door behind him leaving the room dark and silent.

Immediately the feeling of exhaustion overtook her, sinking her into unconsciousness.

A shaking of her shoulders immediately jerked her from her dreamless sleep.

“Clarke, come on. Open your eyes.” A feminine voice rang in her ears.

Clarke slowly opened her eyes, the bright light of the bedroom hurting her eyes. Long light brown hair came into her field of vision as the sleep left her eyes. “Echo?” Clarke groggily asked. 

She felt just as bad as she did before she fell asleep.

“Clarke, I’ve been trying to wake you up fo the last five minutes. That’s not normal.” Echo’s eyebrows were furrowed in a worried expression. 

“You seem very worried about me for someone who tried to kill me a few weeks ago.” Clarke flopped back into the pillows. Her head felt very unclear and groggy.

Hurt flashed in Echo’s eyes for the briefest moment before it disappeared. Echo had no reason to be hurt, no matter how much the comment had stung. She had betrayed them, her included.

“I got the medicine you wanted. It took me forever to find it, but here.” Echo said, shoving the orange bottle into her hand.

Clarke picked the bottle up to examine it. 

Potassium Iodine.

Just what she needed. Clarke’s shaky hands began fumbling with cap of the bottle. After a few attempts she managed to get the bottle open.

Shaking the bottle with slight force, two pills fell into her hand. Clarke tossed them back dry. A cough bubbled up in her throat at the action.

“I brought this in case.” Echo offered Clarke a small cup of water.

Clarke took the cup from her hand greedily drinking it. “You didn’t think to offer me that before?” Clarke asked in between coughs.

Echo shrugged her shoulders. The tall girl stood up and began walking to the door.

“Thank you.” Clarke’s voice traveled across the silence room.

Echo turned her body towards Clarke, not saying anything. After a moment of watching Clarke, she gave a thoughtful nod before leaving the room.

Clarke watched the brown haired girl leave the room. Her thoughts were a mess, she felt scattered and delusional. The medicine wasn’t a miracle worker, it would take some time for it to get into her system.

Clarke felt woozy and confused. She really wanted to know what time it was, but there was no clock inside the room and the void of space wasn’t exactly answering her question.

She lifted herself up on her forearms, looking around. She could faintly hear Murphy’s voice in the background accompanied by a groan. 

Throwing one leg of the side of the bed, she used the momentum to shift her whole body. With the medicine getting into her system, she felt the slightest bit better. She stood up on her feet, she did not feel nearly as dizzy as she did earlier.

With unsteady steps, Clarke began walking to where all the commotion was.

“Murphy, this tastes like ass.” Raven’s voice cut through the hum of the machines and chatter of the people.

“Hey! Don’t blame me! Blame Monty, it is his algae.”

“Uh, hey no. You tried to fix it.” Monty’s voice lilted the work fix. “I think you are the one that messed it up.”

“Yea, Murphy. Stop trying to blame Monty.” Harper’s light voice said, defending her man.

“It’s literally green goop. How do you expect me to make it taste better?”

“I don’t know maybe if you put a little love in it.” Monty joked back at Murphy.

Clarke smiled at the exchange going on between her friends.

“That would require Murphy to have a heart.” Clarke chimed in as she slowly walked into the room.

Bellamy was sitting across from Echo was focused on his food. His head instantly picked up when he heard her voice. A small glance was exchanged between the two of him. It reassured him that she was alright.

Clarke nodded at Echo who only made quick eye contact before skittering away, her glance fixated on Raven.

“Oh, I guess she’s alive. Haven’t seen you since Praimfaya, Clarke! How’ve you been?” Murphy sarcastically said, shoving a bowl next to an empty chair next to Emori.

“I mean I’m alive for now, but from what I hear I might not be after I try how you tried to make algae better.”

Murphy narrowed his eyes at her comment.

“You little…”

“So Clarke, are you feeling better? Bellamy told me you had a headache earlier?” Raven asked, interrupting Murphy’s sentence.

Clarke could see Echo glance at her before looking back down.

“Yea, I just needed a little rest.” Clarke rubbed the back of her neck before shrugging. “I feel good as new.” She dropped down into the open seat, the cool metal hitting the back of her covered legs.

The green goop in the bowl stared menacingly at her. Just the smell of it sent her stomaching churning. Clarke slowly pulled the bowl up to her lips, opening just wide enough to get a taste.

It was bad. 

Holy fuck was it bad.

Murphy had slaughtered this meal with whatever was in it. It disappointed her, not gonna lie. Murphy’s pasta was so good on Earth, but this was so bad.

“Well at least you can still read.” Clarke coughed, wiping her mouth with back of her hand.

Emori bust out into laughter at her words. She remembered Clarke’s comment from the kitchen and the memory was priceless.

Emori and Clarke exchanged small smiles.

Murphy threw an offended look at Emori. “Betrayed by my own girlfriend. Wow.”

“I feel like I’m missing something.” Monty stated, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

Clarke playfully shook her head. She pushed her bowl away, there was no way she could eat that without vomiting. 

Bellamy watched her push her bowl away. He knew something was up, Clarke was doing a terrible job hiding it.

He didn't say anything, he only picked up his disgusting goop for another bite. Sip? Clarke didn't know how you would consider eating algae and now she was rambling in her own head.

Her friends began with their loud chatter of Raven making fun of Murphy and Harper doting on Monty. Clarke just sat there for who knows how long just enjoying her time with them.

Though by blood they weren't related, they were all family. Clarke loved them all so much.

Bellamy pushed his chair away from the table, standing to his full height. “I think I’m going to take a walk around.” Bellamy looked at Clarke. “Do you feel well enough to join me?”

Tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, Clarke replied. “Yeah.” She stood up and for the first time all day, the room wasn't spinning. “Lead the way.”

Before leaving Bellamy turned towards Raven. “Same time tomorrow?”

“Yes, Blake. We’ll try our best to get the coms to be able to reach the bunker. Just enjoy the rest of your night.” Raven said, playfully rolling her eyes.

Clarke inwardly sighed, she knew how hard it was with the uncertainty of not knowing the well-being of those who matter the most to you. If there was one thing that Clarke loved about Bellamy, it was his heart. He loved everyone he cared about wholeheartedly and he would do anything for them.

Bellamy turned back towards Clarke, placing his hand on the small of her back. There wasn't many places to go on the Ring, but she still didn't know where he was taking her.

Bellamy led her down the hallway in comfortable silence. They didn't need to talk to understand each other and sometimes that's what made them work. Their wordless communication. Clarke didn't have to be fake because Bellamy already knew the real Clarke.

He led her into a small room, she immediately recognized it as an office. Why was he bringing her into a office? 

Clarke glanced down at the desk, there were three picture lain about on the table. One of her, one of her father, and one of much younger looking Octavia. She lightly picked up the picture of her father, memorizing the kind eyes she hadn't seen in forever.

“Where do you find these?” Clarke’s voice was barely above a whisper, her eyes burned with potential tears.

“Harper found them and gave them to me.” 

Clarke stared at Bellamy for a long moment before throwing herself in a hug. He wrapped his arms around her tightly placing pressure on her bruises, but she didn't care. Bellamy’s face nestled in the crook of her shoulder, his hand holding the back of her neck.

“Thank you.” Clarke murmured in his ear. “I know Octavia isn't here and I could never take her place, but don't forget I’m here. We’re together, Bellamy. Together.”

She could feel Bellamy’s turmoil about his sister as if it was her own. She just wanted him to be happy.

Bellamy held her for a minute unwilling to let go.

Bellamy pulled back enough to where he could look at Clarke. Really look at her. His eyes scanned her face, stopping at her lips. His eyes never left her lips as he spoke. “Together.” His voice barely above a whisper.

Bellamy’s lips were less than an inch away, his hot breath fanning across her sensitive lips. Her stomach jumped at the proximity.

He was so close, yet so far.

Like glass shattering on the floor, the moment needed abruptly Bellamy pulled his face away from hers, thrown by the intimacy of the situation. He ran his hand through his messy hair.

Clarke’s breathing was deep as she tried to calm herself down, but her blood was burning. Bellamy was the steadiest thing she had ever had in her life. She trusted him with her life, but she was confused. 

She had all these feelings bubbling up inside and Bellamy wasn't much better. Bellamy didn't know how to describe Clarke because she was always simply, Clarke. It was never complicated and he refused to let it become now.

The room was silent for a few minutes as they avoided each other's gaze/

“Thank you for my pictures.” Clarke tried to break this the tension in the room, it wasn't awkward. It was something Clarke not yet experienced.

Clarke looked at Bellamy. He instantly looked back at her with a kind eyes.

“Anytime.” Bellamy replied with a smile that Clarke hadn't seen since Unity Day of when they first landed.

The room felt unsteady, but Bellamy Blake was back at it again keeping her centered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is going a little off canon, but you know the six years on the Ring weren't problematic and I'm a problematic person soooo...
> 
> Thank you so much for reading Chapter 2! Chapter 3 should be up by the end of the week!
> 
> I'm also looking for a beta so find me on Twitter or Instagram at @kyloxvoid or PM please!
> 
> Tell me of any inconsistencies or mistakes and be gentle because this is my first fanfic!

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! I'm @/kyloxvoid on Twitter and Instagram come say hi! This is my first multichapter fan fiction and updates should be every Monday and Thursdays! Tell me any mistakes I'm making because I'm a new writer and I did reread it, but I'm not perfect. :)


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